The truth is there is no meddling God. I am God within God.
A new lesson around slowness is emerging. It’s a bigger ask than last time but I already feel that saying yes has shifted the rhythms of my life. While a small part of me remembers this edge, there’s another part of me that knows some of the biggest things I’ve ever asked for are behind Slow.
For the past few weeks, I’ve been doing more inward creation, a kind of vision gestation. As a 3rd line, every day the plan shifts & I’m getting better at accepting that. If you’re familiar with Definition in the Human Design chart, (Single, Split, Wide Split, etc) this next part might make more sense to you.
I’m a wide split. This means I need a bunch of gates to connect my 4 Defined centers so there’s a semblance of cohesion & direction for my next steps. Since I have such a huge split, (more than 10 gates needed), it also means I need others. I need their auric energy to get my ideas out of my head & body and into the world.
In the past, I’ve cried about this. It has felt like punishment. Like quicksand, stuck, a desire rushing to nowhere. I go to execute my yes only to be stopped a few meters down the road. I curse at Spirit. Imagining a meddling God, playing the strings from the heavens and using me as the puppet for tonight’s show.
The truth is there is no meddling God. I am God within God. And through this, there’s a bigger story at play. One that includes more than myself. I have co-stars. Wardrobe. A film crew, hair & make-up. So as much as we’d all like to imagine it this way, you & I are not a one person show. No one is.
In this new slower than molasses slow I’m asking more profound questions. Receiving more simplistic answers. There’s a pace I didn’t take advantage of the first go around of this shift but it’s been 6 years since the beginning of my experiment so I was expecting and even deeper commitment.
We’re birthed in cycles.
Live in cycles.
Grow in cycles.
Die in cycles.
And in each cycle, all that wants to happen is more life. Easier. More in flow. I watch my kids & I’m jealous. They’re so damn good at flow. At manifestation. No formula, just ask, wait & receive.
This kind of slow isn’t for everyone. After all awareness is a luxury. There’s a certain privilege we have to be able to devote our time, energy & resources to become more aware. If you didn’t get to keep it at birth, you’ll have to invest something to get it back- that’s the game, Maia.
Gene Key 52 is my Pearl. It’s what the culmination of my life’s work will be- Stillness. So as I oscillate between the falsified fear of missing out (52’s shadow) & the reverence of Restraint (52’s gift), the angel of 52 will be etching this new definition into the underbelly of my soul.
SENSUAL. It’s intimate in that it wants to connect you to missing pieces for optimum pleasure. Intimacy is the source of self-inquiry.
LUXURIOUS. It has an abundance of time, space & resources. It doesn’t rush & is never late. It takes its time shuffling through all the outlets and distilling down what will serve & what won’t.
OPULENT. It only uses and searches for the highest quality nourishment, voices & translations to bring diversity & differentiation. That’s where true expansion happens.
WISDOM. Its pearl of wisdom is a result of lived experience looked at from multiple angles & perspectives. It’s not afraid to come back, look again and make refinements. Information is fleeting but wisdom is the foundation for legacy.
The attached audio was a real time witnessing of this new SLOW. In it you’ll hear a bit of my frustrations around not being able to understand it, grappling with its reasoning for being here & ultimately allowing the question to hang when I run out of steam.
I have a feeling these notes, articles, newsletters, and journal entries are supporting me in refining how I’d like to share my own contemplations & translations with you. There are thousands of words, questions, and thoughts I have saved in files. Waiting for the moment the Sacral, environment & others collide. My deepest desire is to have them all under one roof.
My inner vision has shown me the perfect environment. Us gathered, sharing a cup of tea, hearts open, minds aware. In real life & in the digital ethers. It’s calm, spacious with enough time for each of us to intake & share our sides. I’ve been also been shown an internal shift around Cafe culture. We’re not just going there for coffee. We’re going because we want to be hooked into healthy auras. Eat healthy energy.
Anyway, if you’re also being invited into SLOW too, know whatever is yours, including a specific timeline can not pass you by. It needs your breath to give it life.
remember, care for your energy first,
talk soon
Jas
PS.
I wanted to say a big thank you for pledging as a paid reader. I decided to open up pledges because a few lovely people wanted to show their support for Erah financially. Truly grateful for that. I’ve now decided it’s best to shift my creative focus on The Teahouse to really build that out. From now on all posts created will be available for everyone to access, no paywalls. I’ll still keep pledges open for anyone that wants to support that way but if you’d like to adjust your subscriptions to what feels best for you, please do so.
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Thank you for this share Jas. I so deeply connect with you on this personal season of slow. As a creator and a mother, I definitely feel the beauty and luxury of time slowing down as a gift. It feels open and liberating, like you said, a time to play and experiment, but the de-conditioning still remains the biggest obstacle. Although the voice feels more quiet, I can still physically feel the pull of guilt and feelings of should. What I should do... what I should do... what should I do? Your messages feed my soul with the collective energy I needed to feel. Thank you for this reminder today 🖤